APRIL FOOLS! Hanson Confirmed to be Riverwood Spy

A shocking press release from Carol Ciepluch, director of North Springs Public Relations revealed that new principal Michael Scott Hanson was secretly a spy for the school’s rival, Riverwood. This major reveal came out after allegations were made that Riverwood was receiving top-secret information about North Springs’ most effective policies.

An anonymous source sent messages to the school suggesting that Hanson had ties with others high up in the Riverwood administration. An in-depth investigation has revealed that Hanson was not only well-connected in the Fulton County Schools system, but was actually doing intense spying for Riverwood. Hanson was hired to appropriate the best policies from North Springs in a stealthy manner and relay them to Riverwood promptly.

Earlier this year, North Springs revamped its tardy system. The new system involves students being required to log their tardies into a system with the administration in the commons. Riverwood has instituted a similar system, with students required to report to the school cafeteria. Along with stealing the PROS of the system, Riverwood has ironically also stolen the cons associated with the student-focused approach. “My favorite part of the system is actually how much class I get to miss while I wait in line,” says Riverwood senior April Rustafool.

An investigation into the alleged copying of such policies was begun immediately, with Vice Principal Eric Jones acting as the front man. Some documents were then leaked that provided a clear link between Hanson and the Riverwood administration. Investigations are currently being held to look into other members of the Nor

michael scott

Hanson was able to infiltrate North Springs by posing as a fun-loving, care-free principal

th Springs administrative team. “Rest assured, if they have ties to Riverwood, we will find out about them,” says Jones.

The similarities in the two systems are shocking enough, but what is really shocking about this apparent copying of North Springs policies is the fact Riverwood’s principal, I.M. Fake, has begun the legal proceedings required to copyright some of the major characteristics of the policies. The Principal is moving to copyright many names and programs, including the iconic Sparta Bucks.  “This is just absolutely ridiculous,” says administrator Carrie Carreras. “It doesn’t make sense to copy Sparta Bucks at Riverwood. I mean, they’re not even the Spartans.”

With investigations ongoing and new information released daily, The Oracle is committing itself to bringing you the latest info. Stay tuned for a major update after 4/1/17.

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